Turnout, to Turnouts!

 From about age 5 and on, I danced. I started as a ballerina, and from there tried all forms. Ballet was an interesting thing for me. I learned a lot of discipline, and great dance technique, however it came at a price. It was insanely expensive. It was also, insanely hard and hard on me. I quit around age 14, when I decided that instead of ballet everyday right after school for 2 hours, and Saturday mornings, I longed for some form of social life. I also did not have the ballet body type. I am short, stout, and muscular, not long, graceful, and lean. I was weighed weekly from age 10 on up. Kind of hard on a girl....

Now, the humor in this, is a big part of ballet life, is what is called, your turnout. The way your hips turn your legs out, so that your movement is accurate. If a ballerinas turnout was off, everything was off. In the fire world, the bunker gear we wear into a fire, is called "turnouts." Ironic you ask? No. Both require dedication and discipline, however, it has taken me a while to find my true turnouts. What made me think of this, was my testing a few days ago, for Paramedic school. I had flown in the night before, from Phoenix. Of course I woke up late, and ran around the house finding all of my dress uniform gear. After speeding to my test site, I jumped out of my car and tried to take some deep breaths as I walked over to the building. But something caught my eye...I noticed on the building next to it, a ballet poster. They always suck me in, I want to know what is showing, who is performing etc. I look up at the buildings sign, and notice it is a ballet school. The director of the ballet, school, was a girl both myself and my sister danced with. After dropping my chin, I saw myself in the buildings reflection. No leotard and tights, but a blue dress shirt. My gold badge and name tag flashed in the sunlight. I gave myself a smile, knowing that I was headed into the building that truly made me happy. So what if it wasn't ballet. I absolutely love dance, I always will...but it no longer holds my heart.